Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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