Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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