I have demons in me.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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