OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
