My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize