i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
