Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
