I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
