Texts From Last Night

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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?

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  (973): I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now? http://tfl.nu/r8kl
  Replies (12) Good night (2454) Bad night (421) Order T-Shirt
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?

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  (218): Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew? http://tfl.nu/rj2z
  Replies (22) Good night (2627) Bad night (568) Order T-Shirt
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.

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  (715): I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed. http://tfl.nu/mebd
  Replies (21) Good night (4549) Bad night (718) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho

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  (310): Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho http://tfl.nu/chvf
  Replies (56) Good night (2007) Bad night (14755) Order T-Shirt
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  (281): View more from Texas

  Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.

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  (281): Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's. http://tfl.nu/ot6m
  Replies (137) Good night (6773) Bad night (5335) Order T-Shirt
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  (979): View more from Texas

  She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.

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  (979): She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today. http://tfl.nu/i2c6
  Replies (8) Good night (735) Bad night (5133) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now

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  (401): 5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now http://tfl.nu/dpww
  Replies (18) Good night (2115) Bad night (1666) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish

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  (727): I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish http://tfl.nu/fk29
  Replies (12) Good night (2709) Bad night (562) Order T-Shirt
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  (438): View more from Quebec

  Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it

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  (438): Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it http://tfl.nu/s0ms
  Replies (10) Good night (593) Bad night (3250) Order T-Shirt
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.

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  (251): For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso. http://tfl.nu/t5dl
  Replies (2) Good night (1289) Bad night (551) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.

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  (516): Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase. http://tfl.nu/afiw
  Replies (9) Good night (1522) Bad night (426) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.

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  (908): I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger. http://tfl.nu/tt9q
  Replies (9) Good night (1101) Bad night (549) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.

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  (330): OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM. http://tfl.nu/cuq6
  Replies (15) Good night (2501) Bad night (348) Order T-Shirt
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.

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  (647): I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks. http://tfl.nu/gjaq
  Replies (4) Good night (934) Bad night (286) Order T-Shirt
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.

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  (843): the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me. http://tfl.nu/9gb5
  Replies (5) Good night (398) Bad night (192) Order T-Shirt

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