I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
