im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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