hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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