He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
