i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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