ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize