:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
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let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy