Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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