So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
the condom got lost in my hair
So gin and wine won't be happening again
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize