We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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