Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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