I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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