I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
