Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
