Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
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