she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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