so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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