..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Randomize
