Swine flu. Run for my life!
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
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I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
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I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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