I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize