eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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