According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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