Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Life without a bra equals bliss.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
