He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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