You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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