Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize