We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
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