real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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