no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize