what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
