Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
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is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
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His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
It's rum buckets o'clock
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
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