yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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