She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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