we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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