Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
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