you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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