i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
