Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
