I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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