so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
