Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
